Happy 2nd Birthday, Bean!

Bean, August 2003 - 2 weeks old

My dear silly, sweet Bean,

Today you turn 2 years old.

I am so incredibly happy and sad about that at the same time. Sad, because I loved and adored the baby you were. And happy because I equally love and adore the toddler that you are, and the child you are growing into, more and more each day. And also because birthdays are happy events, even more so when it is someone you love deeply, as I love you.

I remember when you were born, a beautiful baby with wavy strawberry blonde hair. You were such a sweet, easily calmed baby (except for that hour or so each night, around 6:00 pm which we dubbed the “witching hour”). You were my cuddly, snuggly baby. We called you “Bitty”, because that is what Bug called you at first (it was how he pronounced baby) and because you really did seem so bitty. So it stuck for awhile. You weren’t actually “bitty” as newborns go, born at 9 lbs. 6.5 oz., but to me you still seemed so tiny, so bitty. And just perfectly beautiful.

And now, my love, you are TWO! You are a silly, sweet, fierce and adventurous 2 year old. Your hair is straight now and white-blonde. Your eyes are wide and blue. You are as cute as cute can possibly be. Yummy-cute. And that is a good thing, since you are also fiercely independent with a quick temper. You are wily and you adore teasing people (you loooovvveee calling people “grumpy”). And when you don’t get your way – watch out.

ie. MOMMY: “What do you want for breakfast Bean?” BEAN “Gummy’s!” MOMMY: “Uh, no honey, that is not a breakfast food” …. BEAN: "AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" And a 10 minute tantrum ensues….

When you are frustrated, there is just no way to escape the tidal wave of emotion that that rises up out of nowhere with absolutely no build up – it is just an immediate crescendo, and it stays that way until you work it through yourself.

I guess the two words that best sum you up are SWEET and FIERCE. You are and do everything to the extreme. And we love you that way.

Other things about you… You love trucks, especially firetrucks. You ALWAYS want to be outside. “Side!” you say. Playing in water, or in the sandbox – that is where you want to be. You used to be afraid of Daddy’s riding lawnmower, but now you want to be on it whenever he mows the grass.

You are talking in full sentences and carrying on real conversations. It seems like that happened overnight. You usually answer questions asked of you with “Yaaa….” or “No!”. You know the sounds all animals make, all the body parts, and are pretty good with knowing colors now. You like to sing and especially like to dance.

You used to hate hats, now you love them. You love anything babies: pictures, dolls, but especially real ones. You are so tender with them. You used to be afraid of the dog, and now your favorite thing to do is to call her, and then chase her around with the popper push-toy. Not in a mean way, in a playful way. You are starting to use your potty, although most of the time, only to sit on it briefly, and then fill it with toilet paper. You like to take things out of the pantry, like a box of cereal or a bag of pretzels, and walk around the house munching.

You try my patience with your demand for things to always be your way. I am far from perfect and I know I always will be, but I’ve learned so much from you. I’ve learned the art of taking a deep breath, and letting things happen your way when they can, of your own accord. You are a gift, and you have made me a better person.

I read a comment in the “Ben & Birdy” journal a few months ago, from another reader, which sums up my feelings today: “Being a parent is like saying goodbye to the same person over and over again”. Yes. It is like that.

Thank you Bean, for the magic you bring to my life, to all of our lives. You are smart, gorgeous, funny and loving.

I love you.

Mommy